Judgement free zone

My friend starts every girls road trip by informing everyone that the space surrounding us during the time we spend together is a, "judgement free zone."  The first time I heard her say that I cracked up laughing but it has become a standard phrase in my vocabulary, too. I love starting time shared with friends by declaring "hey, I'm about to be real but you're going to love me anyway.  Today I'm not faking it! You have earned entry into a place in my heart that is safe.  You are loved with your flaws and scars."

We have the same freedom with our Heavenly Father. 

Did you just feel your heart rate go up and your palms get sweaty?  Anxiety through the roof? Automatic response, "Yeah right?"

I spent so much of my life shying away from the presence of God, prayer time, whatever you'd like to call it because I didn't want to face God's view of my bad decisions.  My "God" - or my brain's view of Him - wielded a pointed finger and demanded perfection.  My mind told me that I'd have to give up everything in my life that I viewed as fun and conform to my view of Christian actions before I could face Him and before He would listen or care about what I had to say.  I felt that I had to fix me before I could come anywhere near God.

Somehow underneath my learned belief, my heart knew my Jesus and knew that the love that I had felt couldn't co-exist in a God who demanded perfection.  Underneath my fear, my guilt, my shame and my condemnation I knew that God loved me.  Even in the muck I had created for myself. 

God loves me. It's not just a Sunday school song.  Wrap your heart around that for a minute.  For God so loved the world, (John 3:16), while we were yet sinners (Romans 5:8), he poured his love on us (Romans 5:5, 1 Timothy 1:14).  

Why? Because we are a testimony of his Love and goodness. So that I can tell you how much God loves you because I know - without a doubt - how much God loves me.

My heart understood grace even though my legalistic brain couldn't translate that feeling into words.

God's desire for us is simply to fellowship with Him.   For us to come hang out with Him.  

"Then you will call on me and go and pray to me.  And you will seek me and find me when you search for me with all your heart."  (Jeremiah 29:12-13)  My favorite part of that verse is actually right after that.  "and I will be found by you..." Ah!  God's just waiting for us to seek so he can be found!

...and then.  I love those words.  We just spend time with God and then God changes us.  Ever so gently, no condemnation, no guilt.  "...and then..."  

So - come just like you are.  Mud and muck included.  

Happy  "and then..."

You are loved.

No matter how muddy you are the water always washes clean and yet stays crystal clear.

Beautiful Disaster

You are the God of my broken disaster. You are the God of my here and my after

You were there in my before and you've planned my hereafter.
You are the God of my broken disaster

When my lamp was in pieces you shined down on me
When i walked away you followed after When freedom was replaced by shackles and chains
when the blacksmiths art I did claim
when the lamp that i held to my feet was a match and the choices i made added gasoline

you were there to extinguish the pain

You are the God of my broken disaster
you are the God of my here and my after

When hope wasn't visible from the valley I dug and the dreams that i carried had to be buried
when the years of tears threatened to drown me and the weight of my failures was pulling me under
when the face that looked back from the mirror wasn't mine and the words from my mouth were far from the vine

You carried my heart and called out my name

You are the God of my broken disaster. You are the God of my here and my after.

You picked up the pieces and put them together.
Repair isn't your style. Reinvention is so much better.
You created a masterpiece a one of a kind. Each tiny bit your love redefined.
You transformed my broken shards of pain.
You made every memory into my ministry.

You poured out your spirit and called me by name

you are the God of my here and my after. You are the God of my beautiful disaster.

no longer an orphan but a child i am called.
Once celebrated prodigal, now beloved and friend.
Made new by the blood and purposed for life
A veil has been lifted and your glory is reflected.
You set me free and i walk not by sight

come have your way, God, here tonight.

You are the god of my beautiful disaster. You are the God my here and my after.

Your plans for me are good. A future and a hope.
You've called me to pray lord your face i will seek.
The more i bow down the more you transform.
The face in the mirror isn't mine that I behold.
You're love will pour out and your mercies will flow.
Your grace more abundant than what i could want.

You are lighting the fire and fanning the flame

You are the God of my here and my after. You are the God of my beautiful disaster

You set me free and your name i will praise you have recreated my beautiful disaster.

You are my without. You are my complete.

"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation." - (Romans 5:6-11 NIV)

Allow me to paraphrase utilizing the Strong's definitions of some key words.... This is incomplete but oh so powerful: 
(To retrace my steps click here, then click the Strong's numbers, and then follow back to the root words of each. You can enable the Strong's numbers in the upper right corner of the scripture panel.)

You see, at just the right time, when we were weak, infirm, and feeble without the strength to stand, Christ died for those of us without reverence for God, and without worship or devotion....

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this:  While we were devoted to sin, missing the mark, off the path of honor and had no share in the kingdom, Christ died FOR US. 

Now, we have been rendered righteous as we ought to be and shown as we would wish ourselves to be considered - all because of the blood of Christ.  How much more shall we be kept safe and sound from destruction, healed, and made whole - safe from the wrath of God because of Jesus!

For if, when we were passively hateful, extremely unpleasant, actively hateful or hostile to God, we were received into favor, changed, and transformed through the death of His son, how much more, having been received into favor, changed, and transformed shall we be kept safe and sound from destruction, healed, and made whole through the life of Jesus!

Not only that, but we also take glory (with reason or without) in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received change and reception into favor!
(Romans 5:6-11 paraphrase)

From powerless, ungodly, sinners, who were enemies of God to become justified and reconciled who have been saved from God's wrath.  All because Christ died for us.

Yep.  This is the part where you shout (or cry, or take a few minutes and be very thankful).



Something else I loved about researching this passage... 

Remember the verse from Revelations where we learn that God is the Alpha & Omega? 

"I am the Alpha and the Omega," says the Lord God, "who is, and who was, and who is to come, the Almighty." - (Rev 1:8 NIV)
This fact about God has always reminded me of the very beginning of the world.

"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters." - (Genesis 1:1-2 NIV)

(I love that there was nothing and God was there.) 

Jesus reminds us that He was "before" as well.

"Jesus said to them, "Most assuredly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I AM."" - (John 8:58 NKJV)

In Romans 5, the words powerless, ungodly, and sinner are all rooted in a combination of a negative particle that indicates "without" and the root word of whatever the word means we are "without".  Similar to how in English the word powerless means without power.

The negative particle used to indicate "without" in Greek?  The letter Alpha.  Wait didn't we just read... yes, we did.

So, God is saying that He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end...

...the without and the complete.

So God was there in my without.  When I was without strength, without reverence, without worship, and without a share of his kingdom; God was there.  Even though I was some form of hateful toward Him, God, "who was," was there.

Not only was He there, but when I was without He could see my complete!

"'Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.'" - (Jeremiah 1:5 NKJV)

In this verse the NIV says, "....before you were born I set you apart..."

So now when I am without - without wisdom, without peace, without whatever I need - God is.  HE is my without and he sees my complete.

"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind." - (James 1:5-6 NIV)

So believe and do not doubt. God is your without. He is your complete. He is all that you need.


So how did that go again?

When we were without, God was there.  While we were without, God set us apart.  We have been rendered righteous as we ought to be and shown as we would wish ourselves to be considered - all because of the blood of Christ.  We have been received into favor, changed, and transformed.  We are being kept safe and sound from destruction, healed, and made whole through the resurrection of Jesus! 

Not only that, but we also take glory - with reason or without (I love that part!) - in God through our Lord Jesus Christ.

I think I can find a reason to rejoice!